"Abundance Through Time: How Connection and Community Shape Our Well-Being"

[00:00:00] Fawn: Welcome back everybody. Welcome back to our friendly world. How is everyone doing out there? Uh huh. Hello, everyone. So, we are benevolent. We are? Aren't we? At the core of it, don't you think, that no matter what is going on, if another human sees another human in trouble, that instinctively we help each other without thinking?
[00:00:28] Fawn: If you were to stop thinking, the instinct is to protect one another. 
[00:00:35] MATT: Okay, I'll go with that. 
[00:00:36] Fawn: And if you think why, I think going back to the whole idea that we're all one, so of course you would save yourself, so the other person is yourself. 
[00:00:48] MATT: See, I would say that, um, I'm better, it's better off in a society of two than one and on and on.
[00:00:55] MATT: What better to be in a society of three than two. More protection. 
[00:00:59] Fawn: [00:01:00] Right. Of course. Right? So. Protection from harm. 
[00:01:03] MATT: Family. Well, I'm seeing it from the negative point of view. 
[00:01:06] Fawn: Oh. Yeah. Well, family sticks together. Tribe sticks together. Keeps me from harm. Each person has a job to do. And you're more able to have a society where one is making glass, like I always go back to that.
[00:01:19] Fawn: I think when I was a kid I learned that, in history we lost the art of making glass through some volcanic eruption, all this information was lost. Something like that when I was a little kid. I'm like, wow, we forgot how to make glass? Like we had to learn that all over again? So to have someone that knows how to do that, someone who knows how to cook, someone who knows how to You know, hunt, even though we're vegans.
[00:01:45] Fawn: Somebody who knows what 
[00:01:46] MATT: food is poisonous and not poisonous. Like, we got these mushrooms outside the house. I 
[00:01:51] Fawn: don't even know. They look delicious. They do, 
[00:01:53] MATT: but, you know. It could kill 
[00:01:54] Fawn: ya. I don't know. 
[00:01:55] MATT: Cause they're not brightly colored, cause those are the really poisonous ones. 
[00:01:58] Fawn: Well, we don't know, [00:02:00] really.
[00:02:00] Fawn: That could be poisonous, too. I don't know. And it's so sick that we just depend on whole foods. Like if it's on the shelf, it's like, okay, that's crazy, you know, if you think about it, it's stupid. We're so stupid. Hey, I'm so stupid. 
[00:02:15] MATT: Hey, don't say I'm anything other than good things. I 
[00:02:19] Fawn: know, but I feel I've been feeling, uh, really ignorant, 
[00:02:23] MATT: which is a good thing.
[00:02:25] Fawn: I know, but I don't know how to learn certain things. Especially these days, where do I go to learn? Can I just tell you another reason I'm upset? This is totally veering away from what we're going to talk about today. But, I, I mean, learning has become so difficult. And you can say, oh no it's not, we have the internet and everything is at your fingertips.
[00:02:49] Fawn: But yeah, but what kind of information? And, if it's free, You get what you pay for in a way, right? Often times. And, and, but, like, [00:03:00] even like a community college, I mean, not that long ago, I was in high school, don't you dare repeat what I just said. I'm not saying anything. Cause apparently, like, wherever I go these days, they're like, When were you here?
[00:03:14] Fawn: I'm like, back in da da da da da, and they're like, oh, wow. I'm like, oh, whoa. Like, oh, God, you weren't even born 
[00:03:23] MATT: young whippersnappers. I have socks older than you. It is kind of scary. Get off my lawn. 
[00:03:31] Fawn: But, um, what was I gonna say? Oh shoot, now I forgot what I was going to say. Hard to learn? 
[00:03:35] MATT: Community college?
[00:03:38] Fawn: Yeah. I mean, I was 16. I was still in high school. And I remember just going up to the community college in town and saying, Hey, I want to take some more classes. I'm in high school. They're like, alright. Fill out this form. I put my name and address I think probably I paid 15 dollars (Matt whistless) and I took [00:04:00] courses like college courses when I was in high school.
[00:04:03] Fawn: No questions asked. Parents didn't get involved. Well, my parents didn't get involved in anything, but I'm saying I didn't need a FAFSA form. I didn't need notes from my doctor. You guys. I'm trying to just take one class as a human being at a community college. First of all, it's so expensive, like out of reach for us right now.
[00:04:25] Fawn: Like I can't afford that one class. It's not 15. Oh, and then they say it's free for if you're a resident of the state. Well, is it really? No, it's not. 
[00:04:39] MATT: Well, it could be if you jump through these 27 hoops. 27 hoops! And do it exactly perfectly. 
[00:04:45] Fawn: Oh my god, like, we're some circus animal. Like, you gotta like, dance for me, and like, I was gonna say that word.
[00:04:52] Fawn: I felt something on the end of that. I'm sorry, you all know I have a truck driver mouth, but I refuse to say bad words on the, on this podcast. But, [00:05:00] oh my gosh. Okay, I'm like, fine. I tried to go through all the hoops. 
[00:05:06] MATT: Mm hmm. 
[00:05:07] Fawn: A FAFSA form. Why do I need to fill out all this financial aid? I just want to take one class.
[00:05:13] Fawn: You say it's free. No, and it's not just a FAFSA. There's all these other financial aid forms, and you have to, like, give them every information about yourself, including 
[00:05:25] MATT: But not limited to. 
[00:05:26] Fawn: Not that I'm an anti vaxxer, but My god! They want to get your doctor's, uh, records of your immunizations. And it's not for what you think.
[00:05:40] Fawn: It's for, like, MMR and, like, Measles, mumps, rubella Right, all this old stuff, but it's like, for me to get that, I would have to go get probably a blood test that would show that I have this in my bloodstream, right? Right. And that's expensive. I went to the doctor and [00:06:00] I thought I was getting a checkup and 300 after insurance, by the way, later, I find out it was just a meet and greet.
[00:06:07] MATT: Did they at least give you espresso? 
[00:06:09] Fawn: Nothing. 
[00:06:12] MATT: And they didn't say, what is your choice of beverage? 
[00:06:14] Fawn: No, what I'm saying is like, okay, to take a stupid class, a pottery class or something, or even an online class, I need to go to the doctor and get somehow all these tests from my blood. To be accepted, to take a class, so I can better , my brain.
[00:06:32] Fawn: And, and that's, 
[00:06:33] MATT: yeah, that's what the federality is, that's what the federal government is mandating. What the 
[00:06:36] Fawn: hell? So, I feel rage. 
[00:06:38] MATT: Right. As you should, but that's why you're seeing this proliferation of other kind of sites or ways to masterclass. I'm a big proponent of free code camp which is just brilliant by the way if you're, if you're a programmer.
[00:06:54] MATT: Uh, Udemy, Pluralsight, on and on and on. 
[00:06:59] Fawn: Yeah, [00:07:00] but at the same time because, you know, ever since I was a kid I've been on my own um, With school and everything especially. I never got the degree degree. You know what I'm saying? I've always been studying 
[00:07:14] MATT: and we're seeing fewer and fewer people doing that now 
[00:07:16] Fawn: I know but like part of me always feels like crap because I never got the degree Having I mean, but I'm always studying.
[00:07:25] Fawn: I am always taking a course here and there and I have been since forever But, uh, it would be nice to, like, have credentials. But you're right, we're no longer, we're veering away from that more and more. Okay, so good for me. But anyway, I totally veered off, guys. I'm sorry, but I had to, I feel like I had to release that.
[00:07:51] Fawn: Rage, but it's still in there. I know Matt's pointing to the clock like hurry up. Okay, so What 
[00:07:58] MATT: just identifying [00:08:00] where we're at? 
[00:08:02] Fawn: That's another one Actually, that is the topic of today feeling abundant but like just going back to that we are beneficial benevolent species Right That, at our core, we are about love, unless, until, some things in particular happen.
[00:08:27] Fawn: For example, when we feel personally threatened. When we feel our way of life is threatened, or our family is threatened. That is where we morph into anger or hate. We get into that primal survival mode. And this has everything to do with friendship. It starts there. With feeling that rage and feeling separate and apart and when you feel that way, you tend to not have friends either because you feel like I'm in it on my [00:09:00] own.
[00:09:00] Fawn: Right. In survival mode, you don't, As a collective, I think when you're together, you feel safe, right? Yes. You feel better. Of course. Like, if, if, even if we go back to 2020, it was a collective thing. Yes, it was scary, but deep down, didn't we all feel like everyone is experiencing it? So there was a bit of, now, I'm not trying to downplay the tragedies, but didn't you All of us are experiencing it.
[00:09:33] Fawn: So it wasn't as scary as it could be if you were the only one experiencing it. True. Or if your family was the only one experiencing it. 
[00:09:41] MATT: Definitely. 
[00:09:42] Fawn: Right? So, all this leads me to thinking about How we maneuver, how we feel about things, and how, if we can bring it to the whole concept of time, and the feeling of [00:10:00] safety, 
[00:10:01] Fawn: the feeling of being protected, and usually, one of the things that is a huge contributing factor to feeling safe and protected is, I mean, especially if you live in America, it's money. Isn't it? 
[00:10:17] MATT: Can be. 
[00:10:18] Fawn: And so, but what is money anyway? Like people talk about Bitcoin, and there are people who are like, well it's not a real thing, but like, cash isn't a real thing either, it's a piece of paper.
[00:10:31] MATT: And stocks aren't a real thing because it's just certificates. Right, 
[00:10:35] Fawn: so it's whatever you give value to, whatever, and then XRP, we were talking about XRP, it's a system. Right. It's not about it being a piece of gold, it's a system. Correct? Yes. Am I saying that right? So, things are changing and going back again to the feeling of feeling, safe, that you're part of a tribe, that you're part of a [00:11:00] family, that you're not alone.
[00:11:03] Fawn: I want to talk about the concept of time. and how we operate, how we feel in our bodies, how we feel in our surroundings, how we maneuver ourselves. So I've been noticing that I've been running, running, running, running. And that I tend to, like you said, one of our really dear friends asked us, like, what do you think the problem is with, with Fawn, right?
[00:11:29] Fawn: And you're like, and I'm like, I'll tell you what my problem is, because we were talking about time, and I'm always rushing, and I'm always feeling like, I'm not getting things done. Oh my god, who are we 
[00:11:38] MATT: talking to?
[00:11:39] MATT: Okay, sorry, go ahead. 
[00:11:40] Fawn: Remember? And I said, Well, it's because I feel lack. I'm in a state of lack. And then Sam looked at you. He's like, Is that true? And Matt's shaking his head right now. And you said no, because if I have 20 minutes to do something, and I can do whatever that is in 15 minutes, [00:12:00] then I'm going to cram a whole bunch of other stuff in that last five minutes.
[00:12:04] Fawn: Right? Because I have an extra five minutes. Right. So I feel 
[00:12:06] MATT: And that's why Can you 
[00:12:07] Fawn: explain the way you said it? 
[00:12:09] MATT: It, it literally doesn't matter if you have an hour, if you have a day, if you have two days. You're not one of these people who procrastinates. You're one of these people who does that thing and then realizes there's 27 other things you could do with the remaining time.
[00:12:24] Fawn: Well, I'm a mom. I have to do it that way. What was your excuse 
[00:12:27] MATT: before? 
[00:12:29] Fawn: I wasn't that way before. 
[00:12:30] MATT: Yes, you were. 
[00:12:30] Fawn: No, I wasn't. 
[00:12:31] MATT: Yes, 
[00:12:31] MATT: you were. 
[00:12:31] Fawn: What do 
[00:12:32] Fawn: you mean? 
[00:12:32] MATT: You were. 
[00:12:33] MATT: You've always been this way. Okay. Yes. That's why when we say, okay, we're going to leave the house in 30 minutes. If I don't get something done, I don't get it done.
[00:12:43] MATT: Peace out. As long as I'm reasonably well dressed and I'm out the door, that's fine. I don't have to find that thing that I'm missing or, or, or, but if you have the quote unquote extra time, [00:13:00] you will spend it immediately. Whereas I'll be in the car waiting for you, which is where I finally come to which is just like, okay I'm just gonna go to the car and I'll be there And I'll sit 
[00:13:14] MATT: there for 10 minutes.
[00:13:15] Fawn: I I was not that way before you were had kids
[00:13:18] MATT: you 
[00:13:18] MATT: were We're always running late. Why is that? 
[00:13:23] Fawn: That's not true. I think you have selective memory. 
[00:13:25] MATT: Oh, 
[00:13:26] MATT: yes. Yes I'm the one with selective memory Love is winning. 
[00:13:31] Fawn: Ah Okay, so now I'm, I'm, what are we talking about? Alright, okay, yeah, I tend to cram things in. And I was thinking, yeah, but it still comes down to probably a feeling of lack.
[00:13:45] MATT: Yes. 
[00:13:46] Fawn: Because I don't have time, I better get everything done.
[00:13:49] MATT: Well, honestly, 
[00:13:51] MATT: It's almost like fundamentally you start from a position of lack, a complete and utter feeling of lack. Not that you're [00:14:00] lacking doing these 27 things, but just that maybe you feel like you haven't done enough, period. 
[00:14:05] MATT: You know what, I think We can 
[00:14:06] MATT: circle back to the whole I wonder Studies and degrees and all the rest of it, too.
[00:14:10] MATT: Okay, here's 
[00:14:11] Fawn: what I think if I'm gonna give myself a little talking to. If I'm gonna give myself analysis. If I'm gonna give myself analysis. I would say as an immigrant, I feel like I better hurry up and pack everything up. I better think of everything I need to take right now before we have to split. So I think that trauma of feeling like you're on the run or getting to a place and maybe you're not loved, you know what I'm saying?
[00:14:43] Fawn: You have to just take care of your business and maybe just trying to cram everything in. You know always feeling like you're on the run maybe maybe yeah like I have a friend who's also like an immigrant and [00:15:00] well actually one of my best friends and She was in the bad situation for longer like her family She saw some major trauma right in front of her where for me was peripheral Like, I didn't actually see anything because my family got out way before.
[00:15:16] MATT: You got out before the S S H I became real. 
[00:15:20] Fawn: Right. And so her family, was woken up in the middle of the night the bad guys came in and beat up her dad and took her dad into jail. And basically they, then her mom and the kids, they had to leave the country not knowing if they'll ever see.
[00:15:36] Fawn: Their dad again, right, you know, and then somehow the father her father had to find them somewhere in the world Like not knowing where they were like, that's some scary stuff. But like I noticed my friend when she has to go on vacation Mm hmm. It is trauma like she won't pack. She she has a hard time packing and getting ready. It is a scene and I'm like, I [00:16:00] wonder if it's because of the situation of having to Flee Like you don't want to deal with that memory of packing up again.
[00:16:08] Fawn: So you procrastinate about it. I don't know. There are always so many issues. And yet 
[00:16:12] MATT: you constantly come back to me with, OK, you grew up that way, but it's 20 years later. Get over it. 
[00:16:19] Fawn: Yeah. Like you. Yeah, but 
[00:16:20] MATT: yeah, but yeah, but 
[00:16:21] Fawn: I'm like, these are not your mama's beats. Yeah, but it's coming out. You're right.
[00:16:27] Fawn: I know. It's the whole case of emotion versus logic.
[00:16:32] MATT: You just say I'm right. 
[00:16:33] Fawn: I always say you're right. Get over it. God. Yes, you're right, babe. You're right. But, yeah, emotion versus logic, 
[00:16:42] Fawn: which is what you say. Yes. You can't, emotion always wins. Yes. You cannot justify and, and, um, make sense out of, what do you say?
[00:16:50] MATT: Logic cannot get you out of a hole that you have dug with emotion. Meaning if you're emotionally connected to something, it doesn't, everybody can tell you, look, [00:17:00] it's okay. You're safe. You're going to say, no, I'm not because of this, because of that. And you'll invent reasons if you can't logically deduce any 
[00:17:09] Fawn: and that's why people say just because you're feeling it doesn't make it fact So, how do we get out of that?
[00:17:16] Fawn: So anyway, once again, we're like I think veering off So going back to the whole concept of time money and Before the money, I think we all can Understand that you need to have a sense of abundance About you, 
[00:17:34] Fawn: right 
[00:17:35] Fawn: Until you can handle the money, I think maybe that's why so many people, when they win the lottery, they lose it all, because they don't have that established sense of safety and abundance, so they don't have the capacity to hold on to the richness.
[00:17:52] MATT: That, that is one good theory. It's not all theories, but yes. And honestly, where I come to, and I was thinking about this, [00:18:00] Yesterday, I was like sittin going, Ooh, I'm looking forward to this, looking forward to that, football game that night, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. And I was like, what am I gonna do, what are we gonna do today?
[00:18:11] MATT: And I thought of one or two things that we were going to do. And then I started writing down everything I was gonna do yesterday. And everything I'd already done. Because I wake up early and do laundry and all sorts of things, right? And that was a huge list, and looking at it I was like, It's been a good day already.
[00:18:29] MATT: I've done so many different things. Allowed me to relax into my day yesterday 
[00:18:35] Fawn: And yes, good. Good. I'm glad to hear that because I want to say that even though You say that I'm always cramming everything in. Mm hmm. You are so charged by people being on time and being late, like it's one of those deal breakers for you.
[00:18:56] Fawn: If someone is late and disrespects your time that, [00:19:00] and then it's always like, hurry up guys, hurry up. We had to be there two minutes ago. It's stressful. And what I wanted to come across today, the idea that I wanted to to relay today was the vibe of feeling abundant starts with how we move throughout the day, how we feel abundant in the way we move our bodies.
[00:19:26] Fawn: Yes, I have all these things to do, taking a breath and just doing it in your own time. And the only way I can relate it for myself is I refuse to be; one of my friends calls it be a New York driver like hurry up drive fast. I cannot do that I will not do that. It feels like no matter what the speed limit is If you're going 5 miles over the speed limit, there's always someone on your bumper who's mad at you because they want you to go [00:20:00] faster.
[00:20:00] Fawn: They want to get around you. Well, please go around me. And you know what? We always end up at the same light, same red stop at the same time. Pretty, well, you know, I'm a few seconds behind, but we get there at the same time unless someone gets into an accident. So I'm saying, I think that If you operate with a sense of an abundance of time and you relax into it, that you actually end up getting there quickly.
[00:20:35] Fawn: It's like swimming. The way I taught our kids how to swim was don't struggle. Don't start moving your limbs really fast because that will make you sink. I don't understand exactly why that happens, but if you kind of stretch out and open up your chest, take a breath. [00:21:00] You float. And the slightest movement will actually push you, propel you forward at such ease and actually with such, a greater pace.
[00:21:12] Fawn: Don't you think, Matt? You're a swimmer, too. 
[00:21:14] MATT: Yeah, 
[00:21:14] MATT: absolutely. 
[00:21:16] Fawn: What was brought to me a few weeks ago was this whole concept of, like, to be truly abundant. Act like you have all the time in the world. And then you have other forces that try to tell you, You don't have all the time in the world.
[00:21:29] Fawn: You're gonna die. You better hurry up and do all this stuff, right? And I think that's kind of evil. 
[00:21:36] MATT: Yes. Absolutely is kind of evil. But for me, it's about what I did yesterday was a very useful exercise, as well as the things that I did do, I occupied my three zones, my body, mind, and my spirit. You know, even though it was primarily just doing chores around the house, I took the time to spin, which was very much for my body.
[00:21:59] MATT: And I [00:22:00] did some, I was on one of those sites I mentioned previously, learning new things for my mind. And my spirit, well, that's a whole other thing. I performed an exercise that you're supposed to perform. And I just reveled in just the vastness of the universe before the sun came up. 
[00:22:18] Fawn: Nice. Yeah. 
[00:22:20] MATT: And , that fed enough of my spirit to make me feel truly abundant, period.
[00:22:26] Fawn: Meanwhile, I haven't done any of those things because I'm rushing. 
[00:22:30] Fawn: Right. 
[00:22:31] Fawn: Constantly. And also, 
[00:22:33] MATT: ponder this. I don't consider anything that I do to be small, and I don't consider anything that I do necessarily to be big.
[00:22:44] MATT: So, even if one of the things you've done during the course of the day is empty the dishwasher, well, rock on. Or, you know, clear the sink of dishes, or whatever it is. Rock on. Well played. Well done. 
[00:22:58] Fawn: That's the difference. Because [00:23:00] I do the same thing, but I'm like, uh! Good. I have all these other things to do.
[00:23:05] Fawn: Like I don't think of anything as a win. 
[00:23:08] MATT: Whereas I go from strength to strength. I go from win to win. Yes. That's inspiring. 
[00:23:13] Fawn: All right, let's keep that in mind. 
[00:23:15] MATT: Oh, I'm feeling smug. 
[00:23:16] Fawn: So anything else? 
[00:23:17] MATT: I'm feeling smug. 
[00:23:18] Fawn: Alright, have a beautiful every day everybody. 
[00:23:22] MATT: Sounds good.
[00:23:23] MATT: Be well. 
[00:23:23] Fawn: Talk to you soon.